Catherine-Ann / Pure-Grace
Sep. 11, 2022
HI-LO-HI with 10 WEEKS BEHIND US (09.10.22)
Hello, welcome to this very late night blog.
I left off yesterday, saying that we were getting ready for a zoom meeting with our Cursillo group. At 7:00 I gave a witness talk about how God has been working in my life through the last weeks. Larry was beside me & said he wanted to join in, & did so in what appeared to be sleeping mode. When I was finished others were invited to respond to what they'd heard, with Fr. Mark being the last to speak. Just as Father began, Larry suddenly, in a loud voice started speaking. We turned it over to him. His words were so powerful & beautiful, full of appreciation, love, faith & hope. We were all stunned. Many were wiping away tears, others wearing big smiles & some left speechless. Fr. Mark was especially moved, as he had been to anoint Larry yesterday morning, & witnessed quite a change in Larry in the evening. Larry's words were so eloquent & sincere. So, that was a huge high for me. I told Larry that I had never been more inspired by him, as I was at that moment. "Thank you Catherine for the opportunity!" The joke today was repeating the speech therapists instructions: "Can you say 'banana'!"
Shortly after arriving at the hospital this morning, the unit doctor introduced himself to me. He told me that there is a lot of 'discussion' around Larry regarding insertion of a feeding tube into his stomach. Apparently, Larry has a genetic situation with his 'anatomy' that will now allow for the 3 options the surgeons were looking at. He said they are now looking at inserting into the intestine, but have to be very careful as Larry has been through a lot. He asked if I had any questions. I asked about the possible timeline for Larry from sucking on ice cubes to eating food that would nourish & sustain him. "Larry will not eat again, he will always have a feeding tube!" As the shock look appeared on my face, he quickly said "But its medicine, things can change!" I said "That will sure cut down on our grocery bill!" Yes, I guess that's one of the things shock sometimes does... say something weird. He said he had a conversation with Larry earlier, & that he was understanding & speaking quite clearly. I forget now, what that was.
He was quiet when I left at 9:00. I was afraid of falling asleep on the drive home, so I turned on the radio (which I never do). I was flipping back & forth between songs of the 50's, 60's & 70's. After having had enough of Elvis & Buddy Holly, I switched to the 60's. Guess what the Righteous Brothers were singing? I was stunned, in a really good way. I listened carefully to all the words, & they very much expressed our beautiful encounter this evening, washing away the pain Larry shared earlier. Have a listen, its so beautiful.. "Unchained Melody!"
Larry was back to being very sleepy today, for most of the day. "Just let me sleep!" My sister sat with him for a few hours while I went out, & experienced the same lack of awakeness. I returned to a very upset Larry, in & out of sleep, with eyes kept closed talking about a lot of things that disturbed him. Some of the words he spoke were: death certificate; long term care; 911; dying if he sleeps, dying if he opens his eyes. It's so disturbing to witness, as it is very real for him. So difficult to break through the fright & disorientation. He only stops trying to convince me, when I refer to my illness & if I talked that way. We prayed out loud together. It took a while, but the turnaround was so lovely. He did ask me to stay right beside him through the night & got frightened if I stood up to switch off the light. He looked at the clock & said I could go at 8:30, when I told him I couldn't spend the day tomorrow if I stayed tonight. He expressed his love so beautifully & convincingly. He pulled me to him & we cuddled, with my head tucked in his neck. He started saying the words to "Unchained Melody", then when I began to sing it, he followed along a little.
God bless you!