Nov. 25, 2021
LOOKING FOR WAYS TO DEAL WITH THIS CLOUD I'VE FOUND MYSELF UNDER
Wednesday, November 24, 2021
What seemed like ‘smooth sailing’ emotionally, through the 6 months of chemo & radiation therapies, has now met a storm at sea. I’ve reached quite a low, wrestling with feelings of sadness, uncertainty, low self-confidence & self-image. After a few days of being upset with the depressed state I’m in, I did some reading: “Life After Cancer Treatment”… The first thing I saw were these words from a cancer patient: " After my treatment finished, I didn't know what to expect. Physically, I felt like a wet rag. Emotionally, I was scared and truly lost." Misery loves company! Her words gave me some consolation.
It turns out that what I’m going through emotionally, is very common. After months of having a calendar, scheduled full of appointments… “Now what?” Yes, the therapies are finished, but the side effects from them are not.
The healthcare teams available to me as a cancer patient, include: emotional counselling, to deal with this dark cloud I’ve found myself under, as well as oncology dietitians to work out a healthy plan to fight the edema, increase in fatty tissue & mushy muscles from chemo. Next step... pick up the phone & check out these resources. Saying that out loud, helps to keep me accountable, so stay tuned.
Thanks to two weeks of muscle spasms in my neck & shoulder without relief, I’m worn down. Physio has gradually alleviated the spasms and lessened the pain so as to finally allow me to sleep for the last 2 nights.
I have gone for a walk every day since I said I would. Gotta figure out how to alleviate the lower back pain, that keeps me from going too far. But it is what it is, so I’m grateful to just get out there, rain or shine.
I want to thank each of you who have shown me great courage and stick-to-it-ness when it comes to pushing through your own pain, to keep as strong and healthy as you can. Thinking of you helps me!
Take care of yourselves. If there’s something you can do to help yourself be healthier, give it a go. Carpe dium! God bless you. xoxo